In my head there is perfect picture of how I'd like our lives to play out. DH would get a great job (or even just a big fat raise would be nice), I'd be able to stay home with Will, and we'd buy a beautiful old house on the Atlantic coast and restore it.
We almost got that dream earlier this year. Let's go back to January and start at the beginning.
One of DH’s friends had an amazing job prospect in Virginia. It was for a really big nautical engineering company, and they had contacted him about some equipment and technology he had developed. They wanted to acquire that and bring him on to be part of their team to help them integrate it to their products. DH used to work on this equipment with him, so he made sure to specify that he wanted DH to come work there with him. We would have had to relocate to Virginia, but the tentative offer was enough that I could have stayed home with Munchkin. We would have had to leave our families too, but the financial opportunities clinched the deal in our minds. For us, it was a no-brainer.
February, March, and April brought contract and salary negotiations and assurances that it was pretty much a done deal – the final step was having everything approved by the board of directors at their quarterly meeting in May. We started getting excited and even started looking online at real estate listings in the area. We prayed every day that the deal would be accepted. I began counting down the days until the meeting, thinking about just how we were going to pack up everything in the house, and rehearsing in my head just how I was going to tell my friends.
Finally the day of the meeting arrived. I waited on pins and needles all day waiting for any word from DH’s friend. I jumped every time my phone rang and checked for missed calls whenever I was away for even 30 seconds. The day wore on without any news…then the next day, and then another. I tried to be patient, but the suspense was killing me. Finally on the third day we heard that the meeting had been rescheduled due to one of the members needing emergency surgery. I couldn’t rationally be upset about that (even though I kind of was). We were back to the waiting game.
I never heard if they rescheduled the meeting, but a short time later we received news that the entire project had been put on hold so the company could focus on helping with the BP oil spill. Everything we heard was still very positive, but as more and more time passed between updates I began to wonder if all this had just been an elaborate way for them to withdraw.
The last time we heard anything was mid-June. Finally last week we spoke to DH’s friend and my suspicions were confirmed. The deal is officially off the table – rumor is that there was some office politics at play and that’s why they lost interest.
I’ve been thinking about it on and off for the past few days and letting it stew around in my brain. It finally hit me yesterday though that it’s really not happening. I knew from the beginning that I shouldn’t get my hopes up, but I still let myself get emotionally involved and start making plans. It was such an awesome opportunity that I just couldn’t help it. It’s no secret here how much I want to be able to stay home with my son, and DH and I both want to move back North someday. We thought this was our big chance and were ready to jump on it.
I know everything happens for a reason and that God must have a different plan for us. That doesn't take the sting of disappointment away, but I'm trying to remember to have faith that He'll lead us in the right direction...one day at a time.
Still disappointing. But, you're right- God always has a plan!
ReplyDeleteSometimes what we think we want - is really not the best for us. God always has a plan - and I have learned the (VERY) hard way that HIS plan is WAY better than mine.
ReplyDelete(((HUGS)))) though - that's a real bummer I'm sure!
I am so sorry for you. That kind of disappointment is really hard. Just try to stay positive. God knows your heart.
ReplyDeleteStopping by from SITS.
It is disappointing when plans fall through. There is a reason behind it, one y'all may never be privy too. God does have a plan but I so totally get the frustration when He doesn't always share it clearly. :)
ReplyDeleteThat is definitely hard! We had a similar situation years ago. We were homeschooling 3 kids, and live in the south where we have always been. Hubby and i were self-employed and doing ok, but looking for something a little more permanent. He found a job available as a facilities director for a large Christian camp in the Poconos of PA. 900 acres, house to live in, all expenses paid, plus good salary. We thought what a great place to raise our kids! The job dealt only with the facilities which he was highly qualified to do, and not managing the actual camps. He had a couple of extensive phone interviews, and the next step was to fly up and visit and interview face-to-face. In my mind, I was already packing for a new adventure in our life! But it just dissolved. He never heard back again, he got no response to calls or emails, it was just done. What a disappointment. I always think and wonder "what would life had been like had we made that move?" Looking back now, I realize it probably was not the best thing for us at the time, but in the midst of it, it was such a bummer!
ReplyDeleteBetter things will come!
Hmmmm, I know what you are feeling sista. It is hard not to get your hopes up on things! God IS in control and he is working things out on your family's behalf. He can see behind the scenes! THanks for visiting Peaceful Divas! Following you!
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