This mommy is on a mission

I've read two really interesting posts in the past few days, and they've got me thinking.

Mandy from Harper's Happening's wrote about how important being a mom is to her. She writes about how being mommy to her little girl defines her and how that truly is what she is, mushed crackers and all.

Katie over at Cleared for Takeoff wrote today about how easy it is to let yourself go after kids. Before her daughter was born, she says, she once wore cute clothes, had every hair in place, and pampered herself with pedicures. But things change when you have a baby! Somehow it's so much harder to keep up with the beauty routine, and one day she realized she was wearing the "mom" uniform.  (I say "she", but I think we can all identify with this!) Now she's on a mission to get her old self back

The two ideas seem to contradict each other, but at the same time I completely agree with both of these ladies. (Please also note that they are two separate posts on separate topics and aren't meant to be presented as opposing viewpoints or pit the two against each other....they're just topics that stood out to me.)

Like Mandy, I identify myself as a mom (and wife) above all else. It comes before my job, my other relationships, and my own needs. I love every minute that I get to spend with my Munchkin as a mom. Even the worst moments when I'm covered with puke and feeling it squishing in my shoes as I try to clean him up are better than the best moments I've had at work. I dream of the day I can become a stay at home mom and be with him all the time. My Munchkin is the most important thing to me in this world, and there isn't a thing I wouldn't do for him.

A part of me feels like it's OK to sacrifice other aspects of my life to have more time with him, to provide for him, to care for him. Maybe I even feel that I should make those sacrifices. As long as he is taken care of, does anything else really matter?

But in taking on that role, I too have fallen into the mom uniform. Baggy t-shirt and gym shorts when I'm home, jeans and a basic tee when we go out, hair pulled back into a ponytail, and - if I'm lucky - a dab of under-eye concealer to cover up those dark circles from late nights and early mornings.

The only alone time I get is when I'm in the bathroom - and even then I'm often interrupted by knocks at the door and demands of "Ma! Ma! Ma!" to answer to. My showers and short and sweet, and most of the time I only shave up to my knees unless there's a special occasion. Sometimes I don't realize I haven't brushed my teeth until after dinner.

I was thinking recently about how much effort I used to put into my appearance. I was cute, put together, and clean-shaven. My shoes always matched, I never had stains or crumbs squashed on my clothes, and I even (gasp!) wore jewelry. Somehow those days have passed me by.  

I've started to realize that while I am mommy to my wonderful little boy, I'm also more than that. I'm still me. The same me that loves to shop, collects bargain books that I don't read, and used to sleep in on the weekends. There's so much more to me than just that one aspect of my identity, and one part of that includes taking care of myself and taking pride in my appearance. Not only does it make me feel better about myself, but how I look reflects on my family. So I'm joining Katie in her pledge.

I'm making a promise tot myself. From now on, I will get dressed every day - in real clothes. I will take the time to put on a little make-up. I will shave my legs - all of my legs - on a regular basis. I will look like the woman I know I am.

My mission? Is possible.